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Spring 2000
There are times when learning is a messy, anxiety-provoking, even painful process. As a student-teacher, I am reminded of this every day.
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by
Nevin
Katz, Jr.
New Mission High School
Boston
tudent-teaching
is hard to sum up. While the experience feels profoundly meaningful to
me, it can also be agonizing. After being a full-time student myself for
more than 15 years, taking on the role of teacher puts me on the flip
side of what I once knew so well.
ack
in August, when I started my graduate program in education, I couldn't
wait to begin the full-time teaching component. While my courses were
relevant and interesting, it was my biweekly experiences at New Mission
High School that struck me as particularly powerful and immediate. I longed
to zero in on the classroom work.
t
is only in retrospect that I see how valuable that first semester was.
By standing before the tenth-grade science class just twice a week, I
could experience the school's culture without being completely immersed
in it. I joked with kids during class and got to know them. I came to
school, gave a lecture, then got feedback from my mentor. I left most
of the grading, planning, and other paperwork to him. My limited duties
freed me up to make sense of the experiences that came in a downpour every
time I was there.
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hen
the second semester began, I was eager to see how things would unfold,
particularly my relationships with students. It turned out my first week
in the class without my mentor was rough. As I tried to articulate my
agenda and carry through with the lessons I had carefully planned, my
attention was pulled in nine different directions. I had to prioritize
on the spot and take on challenges one at a time.
questioned
myself constantly. Was the noise level too high? When should I give positive
and negative feedback? Which kids were getting in the way of my teaching?
And where did I put my binder? It suddenly seemed there was no longer
time to be curious or philosophical– only time enough to be anxious.
s
the weeks went on, I felt myself learning and developing. Structuring
assignments, planning lessons, and talking with kids were constant challenges,
but in time I settled in and began developing ways to keep the different
areas of teaching under control. Still, even after I improved my classroom
management, organization, and methods of evaluating my students' work,
many of the same problems and questions remained. I also began to consider
another, larger question: Were they really learning?
t
was clear that I was not the only one feeling the growing pains. The students
were struggling, too, because I was forcing them to see me in a different
way. I was no longer the fun, non-threatening, cartoon-like student-teacher.
In their eyes, I had become the embodiment of the system. They responded
by testing me in every way possible, including coming in late, questioning
my teaching methods, and criticizing me on matters of fairness. It wasn't
long before I saw that looking to my students to find out how I was doing
was a dangerous thing. I learned to seek out and rely on other teachers
for feedback and support.
hese
days, I try to keep in mind that learning is sometimes a messy, anxiety-provoking,
even painful process. I am not exempt from this. But by coming back into
Room 305 after both the good days and bad, I hope to serve as an example
of someone willing to face these struggles head-on. As I confront the
daily problems, I rediscover my desire to understand, improve, and open
doors for myself and others. My goal is to instill this desire in my students,
to the point that they, too, will take on the challenge to learn.
| Student of Teaching | A Year of Firsts | Continuing
to Become a Teacher |
Are New Teachers
Too Overwhelmed?
Brown University